


Too Far Away

by StarfallGalaxy



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Blood, Coma, Depression, Heartbreaking, M/M, Sad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-30
Updated: 2019-01-05
Packaged: 2019-09-02 15:17:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16789519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarfallGalaxy/pseuds/StarfallGalaxy
Summary: "I wish Zim Would wake up."





	1. Too Far Away

You're too far away right now, Space Boy. I'm sitting here wondering when you'll wake up. You're too far away. I can't help but wish that I was wherever you are. I can remember your eyes, Space-boy, I remember how they're the color of berries. I remember how they used to shine when we argued. It's been a month now, Zim. When will you wake up?

I wish I could save you. Then I'd definitely be a hero, I mean, what's the point of saving the world if I can't save the person I lo-

Nevermind.

You don't want to hear what I have to say. You're not the type. You'd rather have me dead, right? Better me than you, I guess. I'm used to it, knowing that no one truly cares about me. Shut up, Zim. I can hear you screaming at me already. I want to know why you even bother waiting for me when I'm gone. Do you miss me when I'm gone. I miss you, especially right now.

Could I-?

Can I lay with you, Zim? I think that this bed is big enough for the two of us. If you just move over a bit, I think...there. Now I can look at you and remember that you're just asleep. You're not dead and people on Vort know how to treat you and I can trust them with your life and I'm not being paranoid because you're Irken.

I'm not. I'm not. I'm NOT.

Besides, you'd yell at me for trusting them. You'd say that they were dirty or something. And don't tell me that I don't know anything. I've chased you to a bunch of places, seen things no human should ever see, and I've felt things that no human should ever feel.

I shouldn't feel for stupid Space Boys.

Okay, fine. Superior Space Boys then! It doesn't change how I feel about you!

You're my favorite alien. Heck, you're probably my favorite creature in the universe. It's weird, isn't it Zim? That we hate each other but we can stop a whole future from happening or a hamster attack or an attack from another Irken together. I mean, we stopped another invasion of Earth. Full scale this time! Without anyone else!

I'm starting to think that maybe we can do anything if we're together.

Maybe we can. I think that you and I are stronger together sometimes. If it wasn't for Earth, you and me would be friends. I think that I would like that. We could go on so many adventures! I could show you that there are good parts of Earth! You could show me things, too!

But Earth's not a problem anymore, is it?

No, because they left you there.

Why does everyone have to leave what's different? Why do people have to go and...and try and take you away? Do you know that, Zim? We were on Earth when you were hurt. Professor Membrane saw you, he was gonna do experiments on you! Only I'm allowed to threaten you with that. So I ran away with you to Vort so they could fix you. We're heroes now, Zim. Like both of us wanted, but not to the ones we wanted.

You ended up defeating your entire race.

I ended up running away to Vort because I don't want to dissect you anymore.

I started to like you, Zim. I'm still liking you. I liked you a lot when we had to stake out the Irken's cargo ship. I kissed you, Zim. Or...I think it was a kiss on your planet. All I know is that I put my forehead on yours and you gasped and turned this pretty purple color. You said something.

I think it was 'Our lekku are touching.'

Then you pulled away. From what I can get from you, my hair is my 'lekku' so I think that you guys touching each other's lekku is a thing. You started touching my hair a year after you landed on Earth. You pet it, you sniff it, and don't deny that you once tried to chew it. I guess it's creepy, but I don't think so. I like it when people play with my hair. No one does it, though, so the attention's nice.

Now you're gone.

Not dead, but close to it. And I need you to stop being so far away, Zim. I need you to be a bit closer to me. Could I? It's okay, Zim, see? I'm gentle. I won't hold you too tight. Does this help you wake up faster? Can you feel it? Can you even hear me? If you can hear me… please wake up soon. I don't know how long it will be until…

But you don't want to hear that, do you?

You're screaming at me for giving up in there, aren't you? I miss that screechy voice of yours. It used to always stop the silence so easily. I love it when you mumble to yourself, especially when I'm sitting next to you. That way I can't hear all of those people whispering behind our backs or any of that static stuff.

I wish we were home and you where mumbling to yourself right now.

Do you hear that banging, Zim? I think it's Gaz. She's come to get me back. Tak's here, too. I can hear them screaming through the door. I wonder how long it'll take them to give up this time. Zim?

When will you wake up?


	2. My Dream

I keep having this weird dream of you, Zim.

Maybe its because you're so close or because I can't stop thinking about that touch. One brief touch from you does this to me, I don't even know why. I think that maybe it's because I love the rush.

I wonder if you feel the same rush as I do.

I always feel that rush when I see you. Especially in that dream. Or should I call it a memory? Or what should have happened during this whole Invasion. What's that? You want to know what my dream was about?

I don't even know why I keep dreaming about it. We're on Earth still, in the dream. Of course we are, that's where this whole thing began. It was prom, we'd already gotten our graduation done, I was by the wall.

What a loser.

Then you walked in. All I remember is the green skin of your arms, how nice it looked under that light. Sparkly and soft and...delicious...

But I'm lying. That's what I wished I remembered.

What I really remember is the blue blood that ran down you, you calling out my name, everyone screaming because they finally saw what you are.

I dream that you didn't come in to tell me about your race. You come in that pretty red dress that I tried to tell you not to buy. But you looked so happy...so happy that I couldn't refuse you.

Curves and dips, so soft that I could easily forget you've tried to kill me multiple times. Short skirt, nice thighs, none of that stupid disguise. Just you, with those strawberry eyes, watching me. Only me.

Your antennae are doing that little curling thing they did that...one time. You know what I'm talking about! The-the time with the bubble... when-

When you stole my first kiss.

I know I said it didn't count but what am I supposed to do when I feel these things for you?

Nevermind...you wouldn't understand. It's a human thing, nothing really important. You just look so beautiful in these dreams that I have to remember the brief kiss that we shared when we were both happy about being near each other after being separated for so long. Or I remember the brush of your antennae against my hair. Anything so I don't ruin the pretty dream, so I don't have to wake up to my own voice.

I'm trying to get up the courage to ask you to dance- I don't know why, though, it's just you- when you are suddenly in my arms and we're dancing. Everyone else disappears and it's just us, like when we're fighting. Only softer...

Hmmm? What's wrong with my arm? Uh...I don't know how to start. We...we were both hurt in the Invasion, that's all you need to know. I'm fine, okay? It's...it's fine, really! Just concentrate on yourself. You do that a lot, anyways.

Tak and Gaz tried to pull me out of here before, like I wanted to be yanked out of my seat kicking and screaming. If I'm not here, who'll watch you to make sure you don't do something dumb? I can imagine you waking up without me here, screaming that you've been captured like the idiot you are.

I really hope you don't wake up without me here.

Sometimes I wonder if you'll really wake up at all. Or if you'll just lie here forever, never opening your eyes. I don't know what I'll do then. Probably sit here and wait for you, slowly dying from boredom and missing you and-

I can't believe I miss you. That should be a crime against myself but I can't help it. It's hard not to like you, Zim. The way those other Irkens hurt you wasn't okay. They broke you, told you you were worthless. I know the feeling, Zim.

I can't feel it when you're around.

And you're not here. Not really. It's getting hard to breathe. I can hear static again, Zim.

Is it okay if I lay next to you again? I promise I won't take up that much room. See? If I just hold you like this, the two of us fit. It's okay. Laying against you just calms me down...a little. It'd be a bit better if I had your voice nagging me, but this works, too.

I like hearing that clicking sound your PAK makes. There's humming coming from it, too, but the clicking...sounds like a heartbeat. Is that what it is? I like it.

Click, click, click...

Huh? Oh, sorry. I was falling asleep, wasn't I?

I'm...I'm okay, really, Zim. I'm jus...just having some problems keeping my eyes open. Are you yelling at me in there? I hope you are. Maybe it can keep me awake a bit longer. I really do miss you.

I miss fighting with you.

I miss calling each other names.

I miss hearing you yell in my ear.

I miss you coming into my room to hide, the two of us breathing in the darkness until...

I miss it all.

It hurts to think about you, Zim. Even if you're right here, I'm far away from you right now. But I'll wait forever if you need me to.

It's been thirty four days, five hours and fifteen minutes, Zim. The static won't go away, I can't stop hearing their voices. The two of them screaming...

Please wake up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Poor Dibbers... hang in there!


	3. Everyone Else

The day that you stop being you will be the day I die, I think. I'm not even sure if we can survive separation anymore. We're like conjoined twins that share the same heart.

But conjoined twins don't have to worry about a day were one of them wins the Earth.

They don't have to worry about the universe tilting and falling out from under them if one of them gets hurt. No human has to worry about a day he wasn't strong enough to win but weak enough to lose.

They don't have to worry because they don't know. They don't see what I see, hear what I hear, feel what I feel. Their hearts don't beat the same way mine does when someone tries to catch Bigfoot or they see a UFO.

They don't notice the world turning as it's ghosts moan, as they cry out in agony. Normal people don't have scary sisters or scientist dads or...

Or a nemesis.

I feel so lonely all the time! I-I can't be like everyone else! They just mill about their lives and smile and wave and hurt me and see me and point and laugh and stare and-!

You don't. You believe me, don't you, Zim? You believe that I'm sane, don't you? You know you're real! You're all real!

Irkens, Vortians, Meekrob, Hobos, Nhar-Gh'ok, Plookesians, Slaughtering Rat People-!

Please tell me you believe. I need you to believe! I need someone-

Someone has to believe in me...

You know it gets all static in my ears when it's silent? It's really weird. I wonder why it happens. Maybe that's why I can't stop talking to you. Or maybe I miss you more than I realize. Or maybe that's why you won't stop talking to me when you're awake.

Did you pick up on it? Of course you did...you're amazing. You'll always be so amazing, Zim. I wish I was half as confident as you right now. The static leaves me alone when I hold your hand, Zim. Can I hold it?

Are you pushing hard to get better? You're antennae flick every-so-often now. It makes me feel better, proves you're not dead. I wish that I had asked you what you meant when you said about our lekku touching. Is that like a kiss?

Do you guys kiss? I've never met another Irken before the invasion, if you don't count Tak, so I wouldn't know.

Oh, yeah. Speaking of Tak and Gaz. They stopped by today. They didn't even try to take me away this time, they just gave me what they would consider a gift. It's more for you than me, okay?

I don't know if I should tell you what it is. Maybe you'd be upset...but here. It's GIR's parts or...what's left over from them. Poor GIR.

Maybe you and me could fix him later, when you wake up. I'll keep him close to you, so maybe you'll be okay and not to upset that you lost you're best friend. But I think that you won't be okay.

I wonder if you're dreaming. Lard Nar...

Oh, right they're here, too. The Resisty got pretty banged up back there, but most of them are out by now. But Lard Nar says the doctor think you're gonna be fine and wake up soon, Zim!

But I'm afraid of you waking up. What if you're different? What if I am? What if you leave because you're sick of Earth?

It's been 5 months, Zim...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I royally fudged up on FF.net on this piece so, yeah, it's being deleted on there. It will be complete on here, though. So yay, I guess?


	4. Distance Between Us

I felt the curves of your body through the thick Invader uniform. You're quite pudgy, you know Zim? I don't mind, though. I like something soft against me while I sleep. Hell, if I hold you tight enough it's like I've got a bigger version of my little alien plushie with me. Not much bigger, you're only...what? Three foot five? You're so small, Zim, I could probably smuggle you onto a plane using a cat carrier.

It's like cuddling a small meatloaf. A small, clawed meatloaf that I can somehow get myself wrapped around like no pillow I've ever had. We sleep weird, Zim. Or at least I do and I've either never noticed because I didn't have someone with me or it's because I don't sleep all that often. In some cases, it's probably your fault.

I think you sleep weird, I've seen you on the cameras curled up in a little ball on your couch. But I don't know if that's, like, an Irken thing or if your even sleeping. Wait...if you don't sleep then...then when we were just about to fight the Tallest...

Oh lord, you were awake when I had that dream, weren't you? Don't laugh! You're making it worse! Yes, I know I talk in my sleep! I know I probably said things...so many things...

I found out today that you're something called a defective. I found out from Skoodge- yes, he's alive along with most of the Resisty, you can stop bugging me now- he visited and I asked about the clicking in your PAK. Don't get mad at me! I just wanted to know! It's not like I have to sit here and talk at you all the time and just guess my way to the answer!

It wasn't like you were gonna tell me...

You don't tell me a lot of things about your race. I don't blame you, though, I was trying to dissect you. I wonder if that's why I was so surprised those first few days.

I had always pictured you as a heartless machine. Maybe it's because you're 'defective' in their eyes, but I'll just call you different. You aren't defective, not really, and you definitely aren't evil.

It's true. You aren't, no matter how much you say you are. I know because I can see it. I could see it when you told me I was worth something, when you get upset when I'm not there, when you screamed you needed me when Purple almost killed me, when you were screaming when we crashed, to shield me with your own body so now you're lying here hurt because of me.

I should have listened to you. Not to them.

Have you noticed that the both of us have been saying 'they' when we talk about our races? I don't know if you've noticed but I have. Or maybe you have noticed.

Zim, you called Earth 'home' right to Red's face.

I like that. I like the sound of you calling Earth home. I can imagine it now.

...I can imagine Earth. It's Christmas at home, Zim.

I imagine it in the future around this time. There are the tappings of little feet where there shouldn't be, little eyes looking for Santa.

They aren't waiting for Santa to give them presents, oh no. Daddy and Mommy have told them their stories about Jingly Bells and about high pitched carols. They know what's coming. They're armed with Wiffle bats and worse. There's a camera in one of their hands, I hope they've learned from their parents how to use one.

Their parents are upstairs, because they've been on this adventure before. The shorter one dreams of the time he finally one-upped his enemy by convincing everyone that he killed Santa. And the bigger one dreams about how he finally got his Christmas wish.

Come Christmas day, those little ones are asleep on the floor.

But that's years into the future.

I can imagine that years into the future, kids will be listening into our stupid little adventures like they're Christmas stories or something. Can you imagine that? No, I guess you can't.

Do you even remember your first Christmas on my planet? Or the Christmas dance two years ago when you and I were under the mistletoe and Tak-? Yeah. That was awkward. Or the time you tried to bake cookies last year? I have to say, they were pretty good. Yes, I know I'm the only one besides GIR who ate them because it was Christmas and you looked so sad that Keef got food poisoning from them.

Shut up. I really did enjoy them. I wish you were baking them right now in that cute apron of yours. You look nice like that.

I've got you a Christmas present, Zim. Actually, it's two. One, I'm going to say out loud, right now that you've won. Victory for Zim.

Two, I'm going to say out loud that I've kissed you many times before. One in a bubble, one at a dance, one during battle and...

...One right now.

Oh. Oh.

Your heart monitor spiked a little there, Zim. Maybe that means you can feel me and you'll be waking up soon. I hope so. Happy New Year, Dib! The damn Irken Space-boy is alive! Surprise!

...Do you know what I'll do to you when you wake up?

You're going to have a lot more to worry about then kisses when that happens and I mean 'when' not 'if'. We both know that you don't give up that easily.

Merry Christmas, Zim. Or Platypus. Or whatever.

**Author's Note:**

> This has multiple chapters, so it's also on fanfiction.net.  
> If I don't update this, it will be updated on there.


End file.
